Pride of failure

When was the last time you felt proud about failing at something or at someone? 

After receiving some letters of what seemed to be full of hate and resentment to me, I had to lay down and cry a lot, of course, this weekend. My ego was severally damaged by the amount of intensity in those letters. I honestly still don´t know why I have triggered these people so much ! But at the same time I do wonder how come this hasnt happened more often? You know what I mean?

With the type of work we come to do on earth which is very BE YOURSELF in your face and there is no script, and if there is please don´t follow it, there is no recipe for making people to like you or not. This has to happen randomly and at a speed and process that we cant control. And if we could, please lets not. 

Now I get it. Or at least a tiny part of it. I get the people that I personally don´t like and appreciate them even more. Why do we need people to like us so much all the time. I mean for sure we want to belong, but at the same time taking the risk to be you - is the risk also for people to find that offensive. So interesting.

There are no conclusion to life, there is only love. And as far as I keep living I keep discovering that love in the most awkward places like in those same letters, they are also filled with so much love. Why not ? Why are we so afraid of the vulnerability. Why am I so afraid of being disliked and unapproved. 

It is interesting to me this lesson. And the more I let time pass the more the lessons fall like blossoms from a tree. Effortless, like me not trying to figure this out. But accepting, observing, learning. We are all so courageous to live on this plane. 

I read this quote this morning ¨Be grateful to the obstacles in your life because they will re-direct you where you need to be going ¨. I imagine it like a hike into the woods, and suddenly you walking into a huge fallen tree that makes you re-route and actually taking you were you needed to be going. It is a good analogy, because our intellectual mind doesn´t like obstacles or change of plans but our soul does and in fact the soul itself plans and needs those, it seeks for those fallen trees, to drive us to the new road of our lives. 

When was the last time you were proud of a mistake?. Mistakes are the proof that we are trying. And hard core trying brings abundance of all kinds, money, love, friendships, business but also disappointments, failures, heart brakes, etc. It is up to us to decide what is more worth, to stay in the comfort zone or go for it. 

Say I am sorry, I love you, I never meant to hurt you. Do whatever it takes for your heart to redeem but also move on. Help people to move on also and see that we are all playing an important role on each other´s lives. This is the year of Totality in Kundalini Yoga, which means the year to accept but LOVE our total selves. Darkness and light, light and darkness.

When was the last time you were proud of your disappointment?

With lots of Love & Sat Nam.